Friendship
Critic:-
Muslims are forbidden to befriend Jews or Christians: "O ye who believe! Take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors. They are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is one of them . . ." Surah 5:54.
Comment:-
The Quran is to be understood as a whole and not by isolating verses according to whim. If this is done it will then be understood that the instruction is against those who are hostile to Islam and wish to ridicule or undermine it.
The Quran also says:-
"Allah does not forbid you respecting those who have not made war against you on account of your religion, and have not driven you forth from your homes, that you show them kindness and deal with them justly; surely Allah loves the doers of justice. Allah only forbids you respecting those who made war upon you on account of your religion, and drove you forth from your homes and backed up others in your expulsion, that you make friends with them, and whoever makes friends with them, these are the unjust. " 60:8-9
"They are not all alike. Of the people of the Book there is an upright community, reciting the revelations of Allah throughout the night, falling prostrate (in Surrender). They believe in Allah, and in the last day, and bid intelligent (or right) conduct, and forbid what is stupid (or wrong), and vie with one another in good works; these are among the righteous." 3:113-114
"Thou wilt surely find that the strongest in enmity against those who believe are the Jews and the idolaters (Pagans); and thou wilt find the nearest in love to those who believe to be those who say: We are Christians. That is because there are amongst them men devoted to learning (or priests) and men who have renounced the world (or monks), and because they are not proud." 5:82
"And not alike are the good and the evil. Repel evil with what is best, when lo! He between whom and you was enmity would be as if he were an intimate friend. And none are granted this power but those who possess patience and self-restraint, and none are granted it but the owners of great happiness." 41:34-35
"And serve Allah; associate nothing with Him; show kindness to parents, and to kindred, and orphans, and the needy, and to the neighbour who is a kin, and the neighbour who is a stranger, and the fellow traveler, and the wayfarer, and those whom your right hands possess (slaves). Verily, Allah loves not him who is proud and boastful." 4:36
There is a difference between taking friends and being friendly. To take friends is to have a kindred spirit, to agree with them or to be influenced by them. A person can be said to be a hypocrite if he professes to be a Muslim and yet prefers to associate with non-Muslims.
Critic:-
Is it not a case of religious brainwashing and the fear that Muslims who associate with others will escape this conditioning?
Comment:-
You could apply this negative attitude to everything. That everyone who has a belief or value system is conditioned by their culture, or parents and family or their educational system or their group of friends. The hostile person who likes to think this could well be brainwashed against Muslims or into a different belief system.
The instruction is to prevent the likelihood of being led astray after having made a resolve to live a conscious purposeful life according to an ideal. This requires self-discipline is the opposite of conditioning.
The instruction is also meant to strengthen the community in which values are reinforced by mutual encouragement.
Critic:-
I am by no means sure that it refers only to those who are hostile to Islam, or that there are not Muslims who interpret this verse quite literally. Rather, I would say that there are a very large number of Muslims who do interpret this quite literally. The fact that you interpret the verse a certain way is not binding on other Muslims.
Comment:-
If it did not apply only to hostiles how could Islam have spread?
But yes, there are differences in interpretation and each person is responsible for his own. The depth of understanding varies. Many of these interpretations are due to partial or selective reading just as you have done.
But Muslims are required to study the whole and take guidance from those who know. Those who have greater knowledge and understanding try to correct this as far as they can.
One cannot prevent people selecting things to serve their own prejudices or interests. In which religion (or even politics and elsewhere) is this not true? Why focus on Muslims and ignore Christian, Jewish or Hindu bigotry? Why speak of the negative, the failure of people, at all instead of promoting the positive? Does this serve understanding or peace?
Critic:-
I am Jewish and one of my closest friends is Catholic. Certainly, I consider us to be in many ways kindred spirits, as we have shared many experiences as college roommates and in the years since, share many values, and have compatible, though sometimes divergent taste. My being his friend has not influenced me to become a Catholic, nor him to become a Jew. We respect each other's religions and religious heritage and, through frank, open, and wide-ranging discussions, have learned a lot from each other about each other's religion. Learning about other religions and having an open mind such that one allows oneself to walk in the shoes of a person who adheres to another religion is something that I consider to be of great importance. I consider it sad if you believe that you must maintain some kind of reserve in your relationships with non-Muslims, simply because their religion is different from yours. That said, it's your choice to behave as you see fit.
Comment:-
Good for you both.
But do you extend the same tolerance to Muslims? Or are you both agreed on attacking Islam? Does your friendship not prove the verse you quoted?
The shared experiences you speak of are not religious experiences. Islam does not ban discussion, friendliness and cooperation. It tolerates other religions, as history also shows, and teaches respect for different faiths:-
"Revile not those who call on other than Allah, for then they may abuse Allah openly in their ignorance. Thus We make seemly to every nation their deeds. But unto their Lord is their return, and He will inform them of the truth of what they used to do." 6:109
Do you both take your religion seriously or is it just an impersonal idea?
Have you considered that the instruction not to take the Jews and Christians as friends was given when Islam was just beginning and was being seriously opposed as it is now on these news groups?
Has it occurred to you that friendship might have a deeper significance in Islam than friendly relationships. That it refers to mutual aid on the Spiritual Way? Allah is the friend.
"Only Allah is your friend, and His Messenger and those who believe, who are steadfast in prayer and give alms, bowing down (in prayer). Whoso takes as friend Allah and His Messenger and those who believe - verily, the Fellowship of Allah will be victorious! O ye who believe! Take not for friends and patrons those who take your religion for a jest or a sport, from either amongst those who have been given the Book before or the disbelievers; but fear Allah if ye have true faith. Nor those who, when ye call to prayer, take it for a jest and a sport; that is because they are a people without understanding." 5:55-58
Consider the following verse:-
"Let not those who believe take disbelievers for their friends rather than believers. He who does this has no part with Allah at all, unless, indeed, ye guard yourselves against them. But Allah bids you beware of only Himself, for unto Allah is your journeying." 3:28 also see 4:144
It is question of preferring in case there is a conflict of loyalties and of whether a person is strong enough to withstand influences that distract him.
----------<O>----------